Emotional intensities surge without coherence. Grief, awe, numbness, rage, and longing arrive all at once.
Emotional dissonance is not a malfunction. You have not lost your way. You are not incomplete. The emotions of the in-between can recreate the nausea of puberty… riding hormonal rollercoasters, confusion. And yes, you may also be riding hormonal rollercoasters…
For women between 45–55, this in-between could easily be confused with menopause; there are overlapping symptoms. Hair thinning. Insomnia. Brain fog. These are also symptoms of stress. Which is it? Hormonal shifts? Stress manifesting in the body? Does it matter, when the experience is real?
Join a small cohort (max 8) of inbetweeners navigating rollercoasters July 8th-August 26th here: https://shelkimen.com/thefield
These signals show up for all genders. Often for men, there’s an added societal expectation to “stay stable” or “be the rock,” which can turn discomfort into shame. Nervous system dysregulation isn’t weakness. It’s information. It’s your body waving a flag that says: “Something is shifting,” pay attention to me.
In the in-between, the nervous system often tries to hold more than it can tolerate or name. When we acknowledge that, something important happens. We learn our threshold for change. Our sensitivity becomes a map while our overwhelm, shifts to compass.
When anxiety gets loud, try this reminder: Everything is always out of control. Even when it seems like it isn’t. There is nothing to fix. There isn’t a “problem.” There is only “is or is not.”
We’re not standing on bedrock. Not really. Economics, politics, climate, identity, these all shift constantly. People we love get sick. Plans dissolve. Thresholds are crossed, not always by choice. So if you're crying, shaking, laughing-while-crying, flatlined, numb, or roaring with feeling, you are not “off track.” You’re simply feeling what is true, and what is too often hidden.
The body craves homeostasis. But transformation doesn’t come in a straight line. It comes in bursts. In collapses and rebalancing. And the universe might just be listening in ways we don’t yet know how to hear.
Embodied example: You find yourself crying in the grocery store aisle. Not because of the spinach. But because you held too much all day, and that was where it finally spilled.
Join a small cohort (max 8) of inbetweeners sharing the feels July 8th-August 26th here: https://shelkimen.com/thefield
Gorgeous: “Nervous system dysregulation isn’t weakness. It’s information. It’s your body waving a flag that says: “Something is shifting,” pay attention to me.”